Jul 222015

It’s time for a diet.  Yes, a real calorie counting, strict, diet.  Ugh.  I’ve put on almost 20 lbs over the past year.  Yes, I’ve been eating Paleo, for the most part.  I’ve also started a desk job, finished my last year of grad school (stresssss), been on and off of medication to manage a condition I’ve suffered with for a long time, and been enjoying treats and tasty cocktails a little more than occasionally.  I’m literally at the point where I need a new wardrobe.  True story: I burst a button on my pants last week while I was eating a bonbon.  I’m wearing said pants right now as I type.  Still sans button. #classy

What I’m trying to say is, in no way do I blame the “paleo diet” for my weight gain.  I started this blog to share my experiences and enthusiasm for this way of eating with the world, and, specifically, to encourage certain family members to try it.  The health benefits I’ve seen have far surpassed the initial weight loss.   I look so much better, even at this weight, than I did last time I was 138.  I’ve put on a lot of muscle, my overall athletic prowess has improved, my skin has cleared up, my hair has stopped falling out, the dark circles I’ve had under my eyes since I was a teenager are so much less noticeable,  I don’t have blood sugar crashes if I go a few hours without eating, and as for my chronic health condition, I’m completely asymptomatic, which is rare in such cases.

That being said, it’s all for vanity.  Well, and saving myself the expense of a new wardrobe.  I’m an all-or-nothing gal; cutting a few calories “here and there” for months on end and seeing slooowww results is super frustrating.  Yes, I could probably just clean up my diet, eliminating fruit and stevia and NEVER going out to eat or having a beer, and yes, I’d see results in a month or so.  But I’m ready to “rip off the band-aid.”  I know how to lose weight quickly.  It’s called fasting.  But I also need to function.  So I’m sharing my diet.  It’s a total fat ripper, but I’m never that hungry/ cranky on it.  Sad, maybe, when I pass a coffee shop or refuse a piece of dark chocolate or a summer ripened peach.  But it’s do-able, and it gives me RESULTS.  Plus- weekends are flexible so I don’t have to live like a hermit.

someecards.com - My resolution is to get healthier while still destroying myself with alcohol and drugs


On weekdays, I follow the plan below.  Friday nights, Saturdays, and Sundays are off, but I’m just eating “normally” and doing social things.

My nutritional breakdown for the day is 1100 calories/ 70 g. fat / 33 g. carbs / 5  g. fiber / 80 g. protein.  Yes, that LOOKS low but since it’s really just missing the carbs my hunger is definitely manageable.

Breakfast: Egg salad and coffee with 1/4 c. unsweetened almond milk

Pre-Workout: (weight lifting days only and included in the above total): Kombucha

Lunch: Salad with Chicken, random veggies (not too many, as this will up the carbs), and olive oil vinaigrette (2 t. olive oil, 2 t. vinegar, 1 t. water, 1 t. mustard, dash oregano) This week’s veggies, spread over 5 salads are 2 cucumbers, 2 roast summer squash.

“Snack:” about 3 PM: 1 T. light olive oil a/p Shangri-La Diet.  A little self-experimenting, and it really does curb my appetite.

Dinner: 4 oz burger patty, seasoned with a rub, salt, and pepper.  I get grassfed beef and don’t know the exact % fat… I’m assuming it’s 85%.  Also, 1 T. coconut oil, straight from the jar.


If I haven’t bored you to death already, here’s my workout schedule.  I’m a desk jockey most of the day, but my commute includes ~25 minute walk to/ from work, and 10 minutes to/from gym.  1:10 total.  Gym time is around noon, I can get 40 minutes of an actual workout if I’m lucky.  I go horseback riding some weeknights and weekend mornings, others I just do 20 minute yoga podcasts and get some R&R.  All in all it’s a pretty lax schedule.  Weight loss is 90% diet and 10% activity.  Can’t stress this enough; after 70 lbs of weight loss, please trust me.  My biggest dieting failures and worst re-gains have occurred when I have done long, exhaustive, high intensity cardio.  Regardless of how much and how “clean” I was eating at the time.

M/W/F:  Some sort of cardio interval workout.  Spin or Zumba class (depends if I make it to the gym on time) or “sprintervals.”  Recipe for “sprintervals:”  Makes: 1 tired Lauren.  4 sets of 45 seconds MAX EFFORT sprints, 1:30 recovery between each set.  Finish with ~20 minutes moderate effort on the stairclimber.

T/TH: ~40 minutes BodyPump.  I’ve written the breakdown below in case my dear readers want to attempt this at home.  It’s about 5 minutes of each of the following progressions with 1 minute rest between supersets.   This is max reps, so I use about 18 lbs on the bar for my arms, 30 lbs for my back/legs.

  1. Warm up, 1 set of each of the moves I’ll be doing in my workout.
  2. Legs: Squats, that’s it.  Lots and lots of squats, varying the tempo / leg position / squat depth.
  3. Chest: Bench press, varying tempo
  4. Back & Hamstrings: Deadlifts, bent over rows, clean + press.

On Tuesday, follow this up with:

  1. Lunges & Box jumps
  2. Shoulders & delts (5 lb dumbbells)

On Thursday, it’s:

  1. Triceps: Skull crushers, triceps press, triceps extensions
  2. Biceps: Curls, reverse row.

So there, that’s 6 sets, ~5 minutes each, max reps, low weight.

I’ll be keeping y’all posted with my progress.  As for recipes, I’ll continue to post regularly, I’ve got at least six in queue!



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